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Joke

Started by caveman, Nov 11, 2013, 12:41 AM

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firefighter

"In the nineteenth century masturbation was a disease; in the twentieth, it was a cure."

Phoenix


Cobia

With married men it is a way of life.
I ain't askin no body for nothing if I can't get it on my own
So if you don't like the way I am livin then leave this long haired country boy alone !!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's hard to kiss the lips at night that chewed your ass out all day long.

firefighter

"The angle of the dangle is equally proportional to the heat of the meat provided that the urge to surge remains constant."

caveman

Fire Fighter, Your Masturbation joke. You know in some places if your caught masturbating they cut off your hand. I know I'm glad I don't live in such place. I'd would have to use my feet until they cut them off. :o Than I would be in deep dodo. ;D ;D

firefighter

Quote from: caveman on Dec 08, 2013, 12:51 AM
Fire Fighter, Your Masturbation joke. You know in some places if your caught masturbating they cut off your hand. I know I'm glad I don't live in such place. I'd would have to use my feet until they cut them off. :o Than I would be in deep dodo. ;D ;D

Caveman,
A hand is bad enough, but some barbaric cultures cut off a chronic masturbator's penis. :'(

caveman

That's the place where you have to learn to retract it. Say to them what penis I don't see no penis Lol! ;D

Phoenix

how would they know they were masterbating unless the were being peepers  8) its wut did they say about that type of kink back then  ???  ;D

caveman

Well it was usually someone that couldn't control them self & did it in public. They see a beautiful woman like yourself & get turned on. Every body gets to excited every once & a while. ;D ;D Look at pee wee Herman he lost a lot when he got caught & not just his load!! ;D

Phoenix

oh hey that reminds me of a place in san fransisco called the power exchange...me and a couple of girls went there for the errotic exotic ball my first year at the Mustang and the guys were like zombies chasing us around not saying a word with their cocks in hand and eyes wide open  :o noooo.... we got the fuck out of there quick and in a hurry afraid to touch anything...the bouncer was laughing as were running out screaming ewh!!! and he said you girls must not have been here before...we were like fuck no and we dont think we will ever come back he said we should try a differnt night when they have classier theemed night... I have yet to go back  ;D  ;D that was 2007 ;D  ;D wut a trip i will have to go into detail later  ;D

firefighter

(Question) "What do a dildo and soy beans have in common?

(Answer) They are both used as a meat substitute!"

caveman

Please do I love story time!!! ;) I went to the bar near me like about 15 or 20 years ago to see a ladies biki contest. I saw like 50 guys looking at three ladies. I was thinking to myself what the hell is this.I was like what a disappointment. The place has changed hands like 3 or 4 times. It's a restrant with a bar now. It's a nice little place but you order something you better not have eaten for a month. They said they had a special on steak $16. something I'm expecting something the size of my hand not counting my fingers. They bring this thing out like the side of a steer. Don't get me wrong it was good but that was more than I wanted to eat one sitting. Half of that would have been fine. I remember this place they called gewillickers. A friend & coworker talked me into going there. I went like twice that was 25 years ago. The pictures they posted outside made it look like the place to be but it wasn't fun to me. It was awkward!!! :(

caveman

That's a good one firefighter!

firefighter

I was standing at the bar in a Texas honky-tonk and this little Chinese guy comes in stands next to me and starts drinking a beer.

I asked him, "Do you know any of those martial arts things like Kung-Fu, Karate or Ju-Jitsu?"

He says "No, why the fruck you ask me dat? Is it coz I Chinese?"

"No", I said, "It's because you're drinking my beer you little prick."

caveman

Did You kick his a*s? ;D