Coyotes check in on Lena Starr

Started by Lomez, Sep 25, 2018, 02:23 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

Lomez

It was late when I left the Mustang, but a full moon lit the usually dark road. As I neared the railroad tracks to turn toward the interstate, the crossing gates suddenly came down. Odd, I thought, for four o'clock in the morning. In the flashing of the warning lights, I saw some shadows move near the controls to the gate arms. I got out to investigate and found a pack of coyotes sitting politely.

"Sorry, fella, but we needed to stop you," the leader of the pack said.

"For what? " I said. "You planning on eating me?"

The coyote snickered. "No, no, not at all," he said. "You've got skinny calves. But we did want to ask you about this lady Lena Starr up the road."

"How do you know about her?" I asked. At this, the whole pack started to guffaw and blush, which is not easy when you have fangs and are covered by fur. 

"We've seen some of her videos," the coyote said, "though we've got to go up the mountain to get good coverage. She has that minx factor, which, as carnivores, we find quite appealing."

I shook my head side to side. "That's just one side of her," I explained. "She's hotter than a blow torch, sure, but she's incredibly sweet and creative and thoughtful."

"Tell us more," said another coyote, who was eyeing my hamstrings.

"See, here's the thing," I said. "You see the outside of a person, and you stop there. It takes time and effort to see the inside, to probe for common interests, to share silly jokes, to lament the uselessness of a long-passed philosophy major, and to compare lineup techniques."

"How about biting?" the second coyote said anxiously.

"You could learn something from her about that too," I said. "Maybe a little, gentle bite on the lip during a kiss. Not the way you guys do it, though."

This seemed to calm the pack, and a couple of the coyotes tinkered with the crossing arm until it lifted for me to pass through.

"Sorry if we scared you," the first coyote said. "They won't let us get much closer than this to the ranch, so we're left with Lena's videos. But what you said helps."

"I understand," I said as I got ready to drive away. "Sometimes it's amazing how much a chance meeting can lead to something truly special."

Bigfoot

So I was wondering what tripped the gates this weekend.  I was sitting there forever waiting for a train that never came... dam coyotes!  ;)